


The Sky Is Blue

by jentothenuh



Category: Bridgerton (TV), Bridgerton Series - Julia Quinn
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Insecurity, Jealousy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-05
Updated: 2021-01-05
Packaged: 2021-03-15 23:01:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28571919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jentothenuh/pseuds/jentothenuh
Summary: Of two things Penelope was certain, the sky is blue and Colin Bridgerton will never marry her. But when she tries to accept that and move on, Colin makes things difficult.
Relationships: Colin Bridgerton/Penelope Featherington
Comments: 16
Kudos: 808





	The Sky Is Blue

**Author's Note:**

> I am not a Bridgerton expert, so I apologize if anything is wrong! I just had this idea in my head and it seemed to match Penelope and Colin so well. Some things are canon-compliant or pulled from the show/books and some things are a touch different (i.e. the timeline of everything). Also, I did not have Penelope losing weight because she shouldn't need to to find love.

When you’re young, you believe you can be anything when you grow up. Penelope thought she would be a princess or a famous writer (which given her success as Lady Whistledown, was not entirely wrong). For a brief time when she was 4 years old, she thought she would be a bird when she grew up. But the most ludicrous, impossibly stupid thing she ever thought she could grow up to be was Mrs. Colin Bridgerton.

But she did for a spell. At the beginning of the season, she was rational. She understood that Colin was smart and handsome and rich and just objectively too good for her. Of course she had a crush on him, but she knew that she didn’t have a chance.

But then Colin changed. Instead of merely seeing her when she visited the Bridgerton estate to see Eloise, he called on her at her house to talk about books and his desire to travel. They were intimate, precious moments to Penelope, but she knew that they were just a sign of deep friendship for Colin. Then came his behavior at the balls. He would ask her to dance with him for more than just the one obligatory dance forced upon him by his kind-hearted mother. And when he wasn’t dancing with her, he was standing by her trying to make her laugh out loud by whispering his funny observations about others in the room. She was proud that she surprised him with her humor more than once.

When she went to tea at the Bridgerton’s, Eloise confided that Colin had brought home chocolates and suggested she put them out for the tea. They happened to be Penelope’s favorite kind. And the next time he came over to the Featherington home, he brought her a flower that he had picked on his way there. He acted very casually as if she was merely helping him dispose of litter he no longer wished to be carrying. But Penelope kept the flower alive as long as she could and then pressed it in a copy of Colin’s favorite book. She felt pitiful, but that didn’t stop her from taking the flower out to look at it every now and again.

So for all these reasons, Penelope hopes that some kind soul would forgive her for thinking that maybe perhaps Colin Bridgerton might have somewhat been courting her. She thought that maybe he was just trying to be discreet by not openly declaring his intentions. She considered in an unkind, but realistic moment that he might be embarrassed of her. She didn’t blame him. She knew she was not the ideal mate for most men and Colin was worlds above most men. She didn’t mind being discreet, but she needed to know what the truth was at least. She resolved to go speak with Colin. She would ask him his intentions and she would tell him that she was okay with keeping their true relationship a secret until he was comfortable.

She had just found a book on Grecian history that she wanted to share with him, so she brought that as an excuse to see him. Their housekeeper told her to wait in the foyer while he went to Colin’s room to check for him. This is when she heard the voices from Anthony’s study just off the lobby.

“After she marries off Anthony and me, you will be next to receive Mother’s attentions, Colin,” joked Benedict who was less than happy being paired off with a prim, proper society debutante.

“I am not next. I am current. She’s already started mentioning how kind and sweet Penelope is and how much we make each other laugh,” Colin groaned as he swiped a hand down his face.

“Penelope is kind and sweet. As far as temperament at least, you could do much worse for a wife than Penelope.” Anthony chimed in.

“Yes, well, I am not marrying anyone now. And I’m certainly not going to marry Penelope Featherington of all people.”

“Oh.” And as their heads whip around, Penelope became aware that she was the one who had made that sound. It was the unintentional byproduct of all of the wind leaving her lungs as she was gut punched by his words. It was the death of a dream. A closely guarded, unrealistic dream that she was on her way to admit to him here today. Before she heard those words. Before he said those words. She saw it so clearly now how stupid she had been. She couldn’t be Mrs. Colin Bridgerton any more than she could be a bird. In fact, when her mother had explained to her that little girls don’t turn into birds and had felt it necessary to add “Especially not such heavy little girls”, she had felt a feeling strikingly similar to how she was feeling now.

As she came out of her musings, she realized that the three men were still staring at her and no one had spoken. “I didn’t ask you to marry me or indicate to anyone that I expected you to propose to me. Did I?”, she said with much more poise than she felt.

“Pen-“ And she must have flinched at a nickname that, up until two minutes ago, she had felt meant something, because he amended “Penelope, I didn’t mean it the way it sounded. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.”

“You didn’t hurt my feelings.” Penelope interjected. “I am not going to marry Anthony or Benedict either. It does not hurt their feelings when I say such a thing because we are just friends.”

“Exactly!” Colin said with what appeared to be a sigh of relief. “I was just trying to point out that you and I are just friends and will not be anything more than that.” He said with such a relaxed demeanor as if he hadn’t just delivered a succinct recitation of Penelope’s worst nightmare.

“Exactly.” She heard her voice tremble and she could feel tears welling. And though Penelope was typically a sensitive person not ashamed of her emotions, crying in front of these three men, these three Bridgertons, seemed like it would actually kill her. So she followed up, “If you will excuse me, I must be going home.”

She tried to rush as fast as her short legs would take her, but Colin’s long limbs took him to the door in half the time. “Penelope, please let me walk you home.” He grabbed her arm gently.

She gasped at the skin contact and forced herself to pull away, “No, thank you, Mr. Bridgerton.” And just as she had flinched at his use of her shortened name, he looked shocked and hurt at her use of formal names.

“I am actually headed close to your home. I will walk with you.” Anthony stated and he swept her out of the study and on to the street before she could reject his offer. She just wanted to cry and she couldn’t do that in his presence.

“He would never have said that if he knew you could hear. I do not think he was trying to be cruel.” Anthony said, looking over at her as they got closer to her house.

“I know that.” And in a brief moment of openness and impropriety, Penelope spoke the truth. “It would have been better if he had said it in a moment of anger. If he didn’t mean it. If he was just saying it to hurt my feelings. But for him, it is just objective fact. The sky is blue and he will never marry Penelope Featherington.”

Anthony looked sad for her, but nodded his understanding and bowed as he left her on her front steps. Inside, Penelope slid down her closed bedroom door and cried. She was still holding the book for Colin.

——————----------------------------------------------------------------------

Of course, as Lady Whistledown, she had to report her own drama as well. In her first draft, she wrote “As surely as the sky is blue, Penelope Featherington will never manage to drag a Bridgerton brother to the altar.” Then she realized it was too close to what she had said to Anthony, so she changed it to:

If Miss Featherington were to somehow manage to drag a Bridgerton brother to the altar, it would surely mean the end of the world as we know it, and This Author, who freely admits she would not know heads from tails in such a world, would be forced to resign her post on the spot.

A few weeks went by with limited contact with Colin. She met Eloise for walks or invited her over instead of visiting the Bridgerton home. She loved escaping her home to bask in the loving, frenetic energy of the Bridgerton home, but she couldn’t risk the exposure to Colin. She wasn’t ready.

You see, her new plan was to get over him. She would distance herself enough that she would get over this stupid crush, this undreamable dream. Once she was over it, her relationship with the Bridgertons could go back to normal. All would be well. At dances and balls, she avoided Colin by sticking close to the matchmaking mamas, a group Colin studiously avoided. She politely declined dances with Benedict and Anthony. She knew that they too were encouraged by their mother to ask her. She didn’t want any more pity dances and she didn’t want to discuss Colin or that horrible day with them either.

After almost a month of merely seeing him across the room, she was no closer to being over him. And she was forced into the fire by an unexpected visit from the man himself. After a few minutes of awkward small talk, Colin explained his reason for coming. “I know that what I said was hurtful. I am very sorry. I just really want to find a way to get back to how we were before. I miss talking with you, Pen. I wish I could take back what I said. Any man would be lucky to court you. Who knows? Perhaps even with time, I could come to see you in a different light.”

Penelope considered his words and looked at the genuine upset on his face. She realized that she would never fall out of love with him. And yet, she still needed space. The wound, though unintentionally dealt out, was fresh. She could not sit discussing his travels without remembering she would never join him. She could not laugh at the funny, but sometimes mean-spirited, things he said about others at balls without wondering what he whispering to someone else about her. She realized that the hope he was attempting to give her was false. The words said merely as a way for affable, likable Colin to make peace.

“Colin, I do not think going back to the way we were is a good idea. And I do not think you suggesting you will ever come to see me as marriage material is accurate. I think that you are likely just saying these words because you feel badly about what was said.” She saw he was about to interrupt so she continued on louder “BUT even if you mean these words and you intend to follow through on them, I could never in good conscience enter into a courtship with you. For you, I will always be Eloise’s perfectly nice, fat friend. I will always be somebody that you settled for. And though I am not charming or beautiful, I deserve love. To love and be loved in return.”

“Penelope-That’s not-I-“ Colin seemed at a loss for words for the first time in his life.

She walked over to the desk in the room and pulled out the book about Greece. She pressed it into his hands and said “I think you should go. For today, back to Bridgerton House. But beyond that, to Greece. It’s for the best.”

She turned her back and studied the window while she heard him leave the room. She allowed herself one night of crying. In the morning, she would move on. No point lingering. The sky is blue and Colin Bridgerton will never marry Penelope Featherington.

——————----------------------------------------------------------------------

With her recent heartbreak and the loss of her father, Penelope had a difficult year. And after Colin did indeed leave to Greece, she had to say the words to herself a few times just to bring herself back to reality if she ever got to thinking too much about a certain handsome, funny gentleman. “The sky is blue,” she’d tell herself before finding something to keep her mind busy. It was easy to say she was over him when he was gone, but a different story when he was back as he was about to be in a few days’ time.

There was one thing to distract her. A Mr. Henry Dawson had joined society a few weeks ago, at the beginning of the season. He was not the bachelor of the year by any means. He was a wealthy man, but he was untitled though distantly related to some lord. He was unremarkable, but kind and reliable. Which made him perfect for Penelope. He danced with Penelope and visited her at her home. He was not really any more interested in her than the other men at these balls, but they were well-suited. They both had their flaws. She expected that she would be engaged by the end of the season and that she would lead an unremarkable, but ultimately happy life. She was sure that Henry would grow to love her, resolutely if not passionately.

——————----------------------------------------------------------------------

Colin was happy to be home and to be surrounded by his family again. The only thing better than leaving on a trip is coming home from one. He had spent the morning walking around Mayfair and then spent the afternoon catching up with his siblings, playing games, and singing to Francesca’s piano playing. It was a pretty perfect day, marred only by the fact that he knew his mother would force him to come to this ball.

The only thing he was looking forward to was the chance to see Penelope. He had thought that she would join them at their home for his return. She had always been around before. When he asked Eloise, she said she had told Penelope exactly when he would be home. And though he knows they ended things on a sour note, he was disappointed because they had been very good friends and he missed her. He hoped her absence was not a sign that she still needed distance from him. He looked forward to continuing on with their friendship while he was home.

He glanced around the ballroom again looking for the shocking red of Penelope’s hair. He was surprised to see it spinning around the dance floor. Penelope did sometimes get asked to dance, but it was usually by his brothers or him and he knew he was the first Bridgerton man to arrive. He moved closer to the dance floor. He saw that her partner was holding her quite familiarly, as if they’ve danced together before. When they stepped off the dance floor, he stood by her side, but they did not appear to make much conversation. That Penelope was not whispering and laughing with this man gave Colin a sense of satisfaction that he chose not examine.

He felt a presence slide up to his right and glanced down to see Eloise. She was smiling at the pair and she said, “His name is Henry Dawson. He’s untitled, but wealthy. He does something with shipping. He’s nice, if a bit dull. He’s been courting our Penelope for the past few weeks.”

“And has anyone done any checking up on him? Without her father, someone should protect her.” He felt a surge of protectiveness.

“She has her mother, which could be good or bad. But Penelope is an excellent judge of character and perfectly capable of determining the suitability of a suitor, brother. Plus it’s just nice to see her getting some attention.”

“He doesn’t seem to be paying her that much attention. They’re barely speaking,” he mused.

Later, when he had watched the couple for a while, he decided to continue on with a time-honored tradition and ask Penelope to dance. He knew the minute she saw him for the first time. Her eyes went wide and her plush lips fell open a bit. He stumbled as the words “plush lips” entered his brain. He had never really thought about it, but now that he did, Penelope really did have very pleasant-looking lips. He bowed to her and said, “Miss Featherington, a pleasure to see you again.”

In a soft voice, Penelope replied, “Mr. Bridgerton, you’ve acquired quite the tan in Greece. I almost didn’t recognize you. Mr. Colin Bridgerton, please meet Mr. Henry Dawson. He’s new to town this season.”

Colin nodded at the man and said, “Good evening, Mr. Dawson. I wondered if I might borrow your partner for a dance. It’s a tradition.”

Penelope jumped a bit and said “Oh no, Colin—Mr. Bridgerton, that’s really not necessary. It’s not really a tradition. His mother just used to make—“ and then seemed to realize she would have to explain the pity dances to her new suitor. She paused and Mr. Dawson looked at her and said, “That’s quite fine, Miss Featherington. Enjoy your dance.”

Penelope walked with Colin to the dance floor and tried to control any physical reaction to being taken in his arms. She tried to focus on their awkward height difference as opposed to how perfect this felt.

“So Mr. Dawson is courting you? Has your mother checked into his background and his financials?” Colin asked casually, ignoring the way Penelope jolted at his startlingly blunt question.

“That’s a rude question and I won’t answer it,” she said and turned her head away from his.

“I’m just trying to look out for you, Penelope. As your friend. I watched you and you don’t seem to have any fun with him. He’s not attentive. He doesn’t really seem to care that you’re dancing with me. He’s not even watching. He’s not titled. I’m just worried that he could be using you for your connections or maybe even money.”

“And so what if he is?”, Penelope questioned. And this time it was Colin who jerked away to look at her face.

“What do you mean?! That would be unacceptable. That would mean he doesn’t want you, he just wants to marry up,” he seethed.

“Well, you’re the expert on not wanting me.” Penelope mumbled and then blushed as she realized what she’d said. At the first sign that he was going to say something, she broke in. “I shouldn’t have said that. It was unfair. Colin, you must know I’m not like these other girls. I’m not beautiful. I’m not charming. And though I think I have a pleasant personality, I get shy and stumble all over my words with most people. I have flaws. Mr. Dawson does too. We are well-suited.”

“You told me that you deserve to love and be loved.” Colin said as he turned her around the room again.

As she stepped in a circle around him, she said, “I remember what I said. This is different.”

He pulled her back inappropriately close to him and started to turn around the floor again. He seemed angry. Finally, Colin asked “How is it different? Why would it have been so terrible if I “settled for you” but it’s different when this man does it?”

“It just is.”

“In what way? I’m surely a better match with you. At least I make you laugh. Why would life be so terrible with me but acceptable with him?”

“It’s just entirely different.”

“Well, we’re different people. But I don’t see how we’re so different that you would balk at my courting you, but you accept his. Just explain to me how it is different!” Colin pushed again and Penelope snapped.

“Because I’m not in love with him! It doesn’t hurt as much to be settled for by him because I don’t love him. To spend a lifetime as your pity wife, as your unwanted burden you took on as an apology for some unkind words you said would have killed me. Does that answer satisfy, sir? You know, Colin, you are charming and likable and that gets you far, but sometimes you fail to think about how the things that you say and do affect other people!”

At the silence after she finished speaking, Penelope became aware that they had stopped moving and she had said that much louder than she intended. She made eye contact with Henry who looked disapproving and a bit embarrassed and she felt like a monster. She looked over at Colin who seemed stunned. And his shock made her sad...and angry. How could he not know? She’d thought their last conversation had been anything but discreet. Her reasons for needing space were not difficult to decipher. She wanted to cry and to scream and to run away. Nevertheless, she was in public and only one of those was possible. She bowed and said, “If you will excuse me, I must be getting home. I am feeling a bit under the weather.” Then she ran into the cold air to get her carriage home.

——————----------------------------------------------------------------------

Colin did not sleep. He spent the whole night thinking of Penelope and their relationship. Of what she’d said on the dance floor. He had known she felt for him, he had not known the depth. So he examined his own feelings for her. He had never thought Penelope ugly. Others did and he never truly understood. He knew she was not thin, but she was still so small...and so soft. Her hair was like fire, so unique and so vibrant against her creamy complexion. When she finally got to escape from under her mother’s godawful taste in dresses, she was actually quite fetching.

And, of course, over the last year, he’d come to realize that she was his best friend. He missed talking to her. He felt like he could not trust his own thoughts if he did not run them by her first. She was so smart, but she also reminded him always to be kind. He thinks now of his parents’ marriage. He’s always wanted that and he’s loved that they were best friends as well as spouses. He’d always assumed that he’d fall in love with a girl at first sight and that, over time, they would grow to be best friends. He had never expected that he would find a best friend and then, over time, fall in love with her. In love?! Was he in love with Penelope? He really was. She was perfect.....and currently being courted by another man.

Colin had to do something. He had weeks of courting to make up for. That morning, after a few hours of sleep, he headed out to town to hit the shops. He first stopped at the modiste and explained that he wanted a dress made for Penelope. Not the hideous yellow and green always foisted upon her by her mother, but a lovely shade of blue that would bring out her eyes and compliment her hair. The dress would take some time to complete so he took a swatch of the fabric to bring to Penelope. He stopped and got chocolates and flowers. He stopped at the bookstore and bought some newly printed books he thought Penelope would like. He even grabbed from his house a drawing he’d made of an Athenian sunset that reminded him of her. And just before afternoon tea, he called in at the Featherington house. He could hear sobbing once the door opened and he was greeted by a visibly distraught Mrs. Featherington.

“Oh, Mr. Bridgerton, I don’t think it’s the best day for a visit. I think it would only encourage the RECKLESS ACTIONS OF MY FOOLISH DAUGHTER.” The last bit she seemed to scream in the direction of the parlor.

“Mrs. Featherington, I merely wish to speak to Penelope. What has happened?”

“Maybe you can speak some sense to her. She has just visited with Mr. Dawson and ended the courtship. She says she cannot marry him after that display she made at the ball the other night. Not your fault at all, of course. But the fact is that Penelope has no other options. This is a disaster!” Mrs. Featherington erupted into another set of sobs at that.

“I really need to speak to Penelope. I’m going to step into the parlor with her.” As he entered the room, Penelope’s sisters stood up from the couch and gaped at him. They moved out the door once he turned his attention to Penelope standing at the window. She was in exactly the same spot as she’d been a year before when she’d effectively ended their friendship.

“Have you really ended your courtship with Mr. Dawson?”

“Yes. Although I knew what I was signing up for, it really wasn’t fair to him....for obvious reasons.”

“Because you’re in love with me.” Her head snapped over to him and he could see that she almost denied it. But it was just instinct borne out of years of keeping it secret.

She relaxed and said, “Yes, because I’m in love with you.”

“Good.” Colin put his parcels down on the table and clapped his hands together. “Then we should begin our courtship right away.”

Penelope stared at him with her mouth open and then slowly, as if explaining to a child, said “Colin, we’re not starting a courtship. Nothing has changed just because I told you I love you. You still do not love me.”

“Pen, listen. I am so sorry for everything I’ve ever done to make you disregard the possibility of me loving you. I had spent my entire childhood looking at my parents’s marriage and wanting that special combination of love and friendship. I was convinced I would meet the perfect lady, we would instantly fall madly in love, and then we would build an amazing friendship. I just had the order all mixed up. You are already my very best friend and I have missed you so much over the past year. I don’t want distance. I don’t want to give you time to get over me because I do not want to get over you. I love you. And I’m hoping, in fact, that over this courtship, you’ll fall deeper in love with me. Maybe then I can convince you to marry me.”, he finished and, for maybe the first time in his life, felt sheepish.

Penelope was quiet for a minute and then said almost too soft for Colin to hear, “But... the sky is blue.”

Colin moved closer and put his hands on her upper arms. “I don’t know what you mean.”

“You said. You said that you would certainly never marry me. You said it like it was a fact, a truth. The sky is blue and Colin Bridgerton will never marry Penelope Featherington.”

“Penelope, I don’t care what color the sky is as long as I’m standing under it with you.”

Colin had never failed to surprise Penelope, but he topped all previous hijinks by leaning down to press his lips to hers. He immediately confirmed for himself that she did, indeed, have plush lips and that they were both pleasant-looking and pleasant-feeling. Penelope’s heart was racing as Colin sucked her bottom lip just a bit before ending the kiss.

She pushed away and looked into his eyes before saying, “Are you sure about this, Colin? You don’t have to do this out of pity. Or because I said I was in love with you. Or because you feel guilty that I ended my courtship with Henry.” Colin frowned as soon as she said the other man’s name.

He pulled her back close to him, but did not kiss her again. “It’s the opposite, Penelope. I’m asking you to take pity on me. I may have been slow to get here, but now that I’ve acknowledged that I love you, I find myself quite unable to think of anyone else. If you refuse me, I shall spend my life alone. So please take pity on a poor, love struck man and accept my offer of courtship. I have presents!” He batted his eyelashes at her. Colin had always been a bit of a scamp, able to charm her to his way. Penelope believed sometimes that he could get away with murder.

Penelope wanted to believe. And surprisingly, she did. She had taken her time. She was no less in love with Colin now than she was when he left. Colin had flaws. He was impulsive, sometimes thoughtless, and he was always demanding food like an angry bear. But he was not cruel. He would not say these things and engage her in a courtship out of pity only to be ended later. If he was doing this, it was real.

“Yes.” Penelope finally said.

“Yes what?” Colin prompted. She rolled her eyes.

“Yes, Mr. Bridgerton. I will enter a courtship with you.”

“I’m going to take that as a blanket acceptance to my offer of marriage, as well.”

“Well, that all depends on what presents I’ve been brought,” she joked.

He collected his packages and showed her the treasures he’d brought. He showed her that he knew her favorite chocolates and favorite flowers. He demonstrated that he listened to her because he picked out exactly the books she’d have picked for herself. And his attention to detail when picking a flattering color for her made her blush at the thought of wearing this dress for him for the first time. Finally, he pulled out his drawing and said, “This one isn’t as good of a gift. It’s just that when I was watching this sunset in Athens, it was so beautiful and all I could think of at the time was that I wished you were there or that I could tell you about it. So I drew a very poor recreation of it.”

Penelope looked at the drawing that was in colored chalk. It was crudely drawn; Colin was not an artist. But it was clearly a sunset and he had used the most beautiful combination of red, pink, and yellow. She touched the drawing lightly as to not smudge it and said, “The sky isn’t blue.”

He looked over her shoulder and said, “Hmm. No, I suppose it isn’t. Some things change, Pen. Some things aren’t obvious right from the start.”

He pulled her around and leaned down to kiss her once more. Penelope hoped she was good at kissing, she had never done it before. She tried to just copy what he did, but then he licked at the seam of her lips and, when she gasped, his tongue touched hers. It was the most erotic thing that had ever happened to her and she released a sound she didn’t even know she could make. Colin groaned and pulled away just enough to put his forehead on hers.

“I really should leave. But first, I have to talk to your mother. Or maybe my mother first? At the same time? Can we just tell everyone at the next ball? I wish everyone could know you were mine right this second,” Colin said. Penelope couldn’t believe that she’d ever thought Colin would want to keep her a secret. He was a good man with a big heart. She had no doubt that, now that he was actually courting her, he would be her most ardent admirer and fiercest protector.

“It would be great if we knew Lady Whistledown. She could just release an early edition tomorrow and announce our courtship and pending engagement,” Colin said with a laugh.

Penelope’s eyes went wide, but her face settled into a smile. “About that, there’s something I have to tell you before you leave. Why don’t you take a seat?”

——————----------------------------------------------------------------------

In the end, though shocked, Colin was so proud of his wife-to-be. She had taken an uncomfortable, often hurtful situation and made a successful living off of it. And he decided that, with those whispered, gossipy conversations, he had been her first audience. She was smart, she was clever, and she was beautiful. Thank god he finally understood that and thank god she gave him a second chance because he certainly wouldn’t marry anyone other than Penelope Featherington.


End file.
